Thursday, December 11, 2014

Calling All Women !!

     Why should we care about other women?  How, we see each other is important. Sometimes it can be even wrong or unfair. Women have a tendency to put other women into categories, not unlike the ones we often accuse men of putting us in. It’s a habit we need to break.  
      One of the things that has always puzzled me is that we know historically women have been repressed, discriminated against, used and held up to unrealistic ideals both by men and society. There are stories, about strong women throughout history, women of courage, strength, and honor who gave of themselves. Going back to even biblical times women made a tremendous difference in history yet received little or no credit.
     As women, I think we fail each other miserably at times.  We judge each other on appearance, whom we are with, and even how much our income is.  Frankly when we do this we let each other down. Who can honestly say that they have never heard another woman snipe and make biting comments regarding someone else who is unaware? For myself, I find when someone is like that I have to wonder just what they have to say about me when I am not around. Are they as equally biting and hurtful?
     Men, on the other hand, can be just as bitchy yet they cling to an invisible brotherhood code of don’t ask don’t tell. Can I get a copy of the brotherhood code book? I’m sure it would make an interesting and enlightening read.
That “guy code” doesn’t exist among women. It should! Here is a simple truth, if women banded together talked to each other honestly about things we would see we are all basically the same. In your twenties you’re tied up in how you look, your career, and who you’re going to marry. By your thirties if you’re married it’s about family, appearance, and getting ahead.
When you hit your forties things start to change. Unless you’re one of those women trapped into trying to hold on to twenty of course.
     For the rest of us, we begin to relax, at forty. If you're married or not you’re too tired by life to worry about the small stuff. We begin to look inside ourselves to find the answers. The good news is most of us do; we find ourselves. There is a confidence that a woman have as she gets older.  I believe in part it comes from learning to truly love yourself as a person. That doesn’t mean we can rest on our laurels and just worry about our own interests. Sharing that positive outlook, that secret self we have found with our younger female friends and children is important. As women, we need to stand together teach each other what it means to be a woman in today’s world.
     The clock is going to continue to tick, despite our best intentions. As older women, we set an example. It’s our responsibility to teach younger women that we should, in fact, be a sisterhood of many. All the time not just when it comes to things like cancer or abuse.
     The choices we make today on how we treat each other will affect our daughters and their daughters.  Women are police officers, soldiers, doctors, and entrepreneurs. We are not afraid to work for what we want. By standing together, truly supporting each other and getting involved we can each make a difference.
     If you’re the kind of person who would stop to rescue a puppy you saw left on the side of the road then this message is for you. This Christmas rescue another woman. If it’s a bag of groceries, babysitting to give someone a break, or even a cup of coffee so you can listen while they talk, just do it. Give one day a month to helping other women who are in need of help.
Calling all women it’s time to pay it forward. Surprise a woman you know or even don’t know with a helping hand. Do something out of your comfort zone for another woman, and you may just be surprised how it makes you feel.

Women for Women International
Women Helping Battered Women
Oprah's Womans Orginization

Saturday, December 06, 2014

I Am A Hot Mess

     We've all had those moments in our lives when we worry ourselves sick. Are we good enough, will we succeed in what we do? We apply for jobs, meet potential mates or possible new friends, and if you’re like most people in the back of your mind, there is a little voice that asks will I be enough?
     From our first day of kindergarten to our first big job interview each of us wants the world we live in to accept who we are. It doesn't matter that as we get older we give ourselves the pep talks about it not mattering if things don’t go the way we may want them to. Because the truth is it does matter, at least on some level.
     I've written my whole life, read thousands of books in my lifetime. It is something I have always been deeply passionate about. Why? Because, it does matter to me. What I have learned over the years though is that not every potential employer is going to love you or think you’re the right fit for the job. Not every man or woman you meet is going to fall in love with you and want forever. Sometimes that’s a blessing.
     People say, "takeoff the rose colored glasses" but when we do something that is a challenge I say, Put those babies on. Wear them loud and proud. See the world through the clouded view rather than the harsh view others may try to force us to believe. It’s how we get through, how we don’t let the harshness of life steal our dreams.
     In life, we all fall down sometimes but if you’re smart you get back up. Thomas Edison preformed thousands of experiments, and there were people who told him to give it up that his inventions were a waste of time. But he didn’t.
I can admit I am what you would call a hot mess. I am constantly going in, to many different directions to count. When I’m writing, I lose all track of time and place. I make mistakes, fall on my face and hit walls that life puts in my way. I’m not the best mother, wife, or friend but at the end of the day I am me, and that’s good enough for them. It’s good enough for me.
     So when that little voice is whispering in your ear that you’re going to fall on your face, fail, crash and burn or that you should just give up. Push the imp in the mud and keep going. Put on your rose colored glasses and take on the world, by storm.   

Monday, November 17, 2014

Atlantic City is There a Chance for Rebirth


     Why isn't the 11.9% unemployment rate in Atlantic County getting any media attention? Living here in New Jersey at the shore, I would have to be dead not to know about the casino’s that have closed their doors. The rumors that other casinos are preparing to file for bankruptcy, it is rather frightening if you take a moment to think about it.
     Do that think about the 8,000  hotel employees that are now out of jobs, and the ones who may be shortly? To ignore the ostrich in the center of the room is just plain dumb. So I have to ask myself just what is the plan for Atlantic City? It has been a historical tourist location for families in New York, New Jersey, and Pennsylvania as well as for visitors from other countries. So why aren’t we hearing about a plan to change gears and take a different approach revitalizing the area rather than hanging onto the casino’s which are dying?
     The fact is that since other states such as New York and Pennsylvania have earned the right to have gambling in their states the influx of customer to that area has died off drastically. Here’s the thing though, it is as much a part of our New Jersey culture as is skiing, boating, or going to the mountains. Since families began taking time in the summer to relocate to the beach, it has been one of the more long-standing resort areas within New Jersey. In fact, AC was the location for the average man and his family to escape even for a short weekend.
     Please don’t misunderstand I am not against other states having casino’s in their home state. What I am against is watching people suffer when this issue should be on channel twelve news or one of the other national media broadcasters. It should be in the forefront of the media’s attention, & in the people’s attention.
     I don’t have a solution to revitalize an area that is known for its many  internal issues. Unless something changes drastically, it is almost a sure bet that the crime rate will go up extensively there.  At this point though someone does need to come up with a plan to draw business back to AC. To make it the tourist or residual income draw it once was and could be again. Government insists “Sure things are getting better.” I’m just not buying it, and here’s another thought. What happens when the unemployment runs out for those moms and dads who have given their lives to a thankless industry?
     How do you start over when there is nothing there to start with? I could bombard you with statistics and numbers but for tonight I won’t. The only real player in this with any kind of plan seems to be Stockton College. There intent to open a pilot campus in one of the hotels and keep part of the hotel open for business.
     I only ask that you leave a comment either here or on my author page under the blog post. Tell me do you think if the media/Governor/New Jersey Corporations are doing anything to fix this issue they have dumped on New Jersey’s residents lap? What do you think the solution is?

Or do you think we are stepping closer to another great depression?

Monday, November 10, 2014

Honor Our Remaining Veterans

23,234,000 Veteran’s Remaining

Since the birth of this country 41,892,128 Soldiers took up arms and served their country faithfully during times of war. From the birth of the American Revolution to the present day, their job hasn't changed much in over almost a century and a half.
If it’s an enemy, they squash them defending our beliefs and ideals. These men and women have all too often had to take abuses from their enemies that they don’t deserve. Abuse that at times came from right here at home.

 American soldiers have served this country during times of war and peace. If you take that complete figure provided by The US Department of Veteran Affairs and look at only those who served during war times, it is a shocking Statistic. 16,962,000, soldiers who fought for this country are living still today. Men and women from every nationality and walk of life, each soldier who sacrificed a piece of themselves to keep us safe. Sixteen million may not seem like a lot, but that is all that remain.
Those are the ones still alive still living with the high price of being a soldier. Our Vets, I have no doubt would pick up arms to defend their country today if the need arose.
Per The National WWII War Museum 

It takes a certain stamp of character to become a soldier. I would go so far as to say that going in these individuals are one thing and come out from the experience someone completely different. They know what it means to be responsible for the safety of others, to sacrifice all for the greater good.
When life is good, we seem to forget just what it means to serve as a soldier, protecting the rights of all. We forget that it's our job to honor and protect them as well.  It’s easy to forget if you haven’t lived it. If it hasn't touched your life personally. These men and woman carry scars the average person cannot fathom. I find it sad that in a country that wishes to honor our differences and the  individuality of all, we cannot honor the diverse population of men and women who gave their lives fighting for the freedoms we take for granted.
We will take off from work or school, for religious holidays, to honor presidents, and political figures, yet we do no more than mark a date on the calendar to recognize our brave soldiers who gave everything. We cheapen their unselfish behavior in keeping us safe. They protect an ideal that should still matter, and does to most of them.
 It’s a belief that the American people need to have someone watching their backs. That someone has been our soldiers. The same soldiers the media love to condemn, unable in their ignorance to even comprehend what it means to live under hostile conditions. They have to live with knowing that a man, woman, or child who walks around their base during daylight can very well be the same sniper taking shots at them from a building or hilltop.
We as a culture have cheapened their day, "Veterans Day"  into no more than a shopping holiday. Is that really honoring them? Right now in most states Veterans Day is one of the many holidays on the calendar, not unlike Saint Patrick’s Day or Valentine’s Day that means little or nothing. We as its citizens have done that. Diminished their sacrifice, taking away the honor they each earned.
Having a husband who served his country as a soldier for over twenty-five years I can better understand why our Veterans get pissed off at us. Where their frustration must come from is understandable. Do we treat Veterans Day like any other day? The answer is yes, we as a society have minimized the meaning behind it.
I can say without a doubt that if the need ever arose for our Veterans to defend us here in our own backyard, those that can would do so. They wouldn't run around looking for someone else to do it for them, but would stand firm as the men and woman of honor that they have always been. They would do it far more effectively then you or I could.

 Veterans Day is Tuesday November 11, honor those who sacrifice themselves to keep us safe.  Honor the 23,234,000 Veterans living today. Honor their sacrifice, their courage, their gift. 

Additional Statistics
Living Veterans(Periods of War & Peace) 23,234,000 

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As a recently married 46 year old I am in the process of finishing my degree. Working to take care of my family and live my life.Blogging, working, writing, and chugging along like most of us.  Who am I ? I am you, I am me, I am your mother, friend, the best and worst that we each have inside of us. I am a different perspective and find myself fascinated by the interesting moments in life.

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